The outpouring of joy was palpable when it was announced that Adam & Joe would be returning to their 6 Music show for a twelve week run. They were sorely missed, especially by me and you probably, like somebody had ripped off my ears and wouldn't give them back for fifteen months. For fifteen months I wandered through the radio wilderness, dipping into my old podcasts on Cd's what I made with a melancholic happiness. There's nothing like listening to an Adam & Joe podcast or a Black Squadron command with fresh ears, this week my ears were once again made delirious. Since this isn't strictly telly, I thought I'd use this as an opportunity to revisit my favourite classic Adam & Joe Show sketches from their telly days in honour of their return. I was going to do a Top Five but it was well too hard so I'm rolling with a Top Six instead. They call me Tony Maverick (not really). Aye, so, here ye are....
6. American Beautoy
This cuddly toy homage, or piss-take, of the Sam Mendes classic (ahem) is packed full of quotes, overused by my brother and I and my pals. This is the opening line: 'My name is Molester Burnham, by the end of this film I'll be dead and you'll wish you were.' Brilliant. There are a number of other things that make this parody excellent: the monkey playing Spacey that weirdly looks very like Spacey, the Dancing Bag ('Dance ye fucker! Large it!'), the Real Estate Lion King ('Hakunamatata.'), to name but a few. Intrigued? YouTube! Go! Now! Or in a minute.
5. People Place
'Welcome to People Place, the show that goes wherever there's a place with people, in it.' I'll give the person who can name the original show being parodied here a MILLION POUNDS, not really, but I will give you props. Whatever its name, it was one of those filler show, watched by no-one for more than three minutes. The beige presenters seemed to travel to shopping centers and attempt to fill a show with the blandest gubbins you ever did see. The essence of it all is captured in 'People Place': the matching yellow jogging suits, the crap, mind numbingly pointless items ('What's in your boot?' 'Luggage.') and the bizarre asides('Take a look at this mug tree. Just give it a whizz and mugs there is!' See when I was twelve, THAT was the funniest thing I'd ever heard).
4. Star Wars in Their Eyes
Buckles and Cornballs parodies using Star Wars figures were always brilliant and there were loads to chose from, 'The Imperial Family', 'TFI A long time ago in a Galaxy far, far away.', 'Big Jabba', 'Chew Wants to Be a Millionaire', but my favourite has to be 'Star Wars in Their Eyes', mainly because of C3P0 and R2D2's homoerotic (can droids be homoerotic?) Pet Shop Droids. Dressed in the yellow pointy hats they sing 'Come on, R2D2 touch me,' (to the tune of 'Se a vida e') and for some reason this line rendered me and my pals helpless. I love that the premise of the film is that Luke finds his Dad (Darth Vader, 'member?) embarrassing when he sings karaoke: 'Gee Han, my Dad is so embarrassing.' The absolute best thing about it though has to be Mattchew Kelly, a plastic Wookie in a spangly suit? Aye, that'll do me.
3. The 1980s House
Sending up the, what I call, 'time-travelling home shows' (catchy, eh?) of the time, like 'The 1900s House', 'The 1980s House' follows the Fatboyslim family as they attempt to live life as they would have done way back in the 1980s. The house they come up with is actually pretty awesome, I genuinely want to live there, I mean they've got a telly alarm. Amazing. Seriously though, pull up the video on YouTube and check out Adam, the mum's, reaction to the house and also his hair. Both are fucking funny. Joe plays dad, Paul, who works as stock market trader. After champagne and a few lines of coke he heads off to work on his Sinclair C5. Ha! Why, oh why did they not catch on? Also after you've watched this, look for Adam's 80s song what he did for song wars, it has the same feel to it.
2. Omniken: Handy Andy
This sketch is pure jam-packed with LOLZ, ROFLs, LMAOs etc. Ken Korda interviews Handy Andy-Kane off of Changing Rooms, 'perhaps the most famous carpenter since Jesus'. Handy lives on a caravan site in Lower-Blackendecker. 'Handy was the youngest child of Randy and Mandy Andy-Kane and grew up along with brothers Dandy and Sandy and Sister Candy, next to the Wandsworth branch of B&Q.' *DIES LAUGHING* Ken Korda was a family favourite, with my brother and I impersonating his bizarre Morrissey/Kermit the Frog/car horn voice, great fun to do and very addictive, others may find you extremely annoying. Also Handy Andy is an excellent sport, engaging fully in the piss-take, creating art out of old junk which he calls 'Cryptosmashism'. But how does he find time after his 'DIY time' for 'ME-IY time'? Just watch it, it's fucking funny.
1. Dr. Spankles Hollywood Waxorama
An obscure choice maybe but it's my number one because it's weird, daft and uses real people as actual paying customers. Everyone likes them wax museums where the models move and talk, right? Well Adam & Joe test this theory by opening their Hollywood themed museum with shop dummies acting out scenes from famous films. First up it's Tom Cruise in 'Mission Impossible' and as the tatty shop dummy is lowered down, the looks on the faces of the customers are priceless as it begins to dawn on them that this museum might be total shite. Look out for Tom Hanks in Philadelphia, there are no words. Some people go with it and laugh at the crude exhibits but others don't look so amused. I would give my right and left arms to have gone to 'Dr. Spankles Hollywood Waxorama', so whenever I see a run-down, shit looking exhibit, I am going, lest I miss something as wonderful as the museum Buckles and Cornballs laid on that day.
Now please go and enjoy these and the many other A&J videos on YouTube. See you next Saturday Black Squadron! Why be Denny Different?!
Oh and Stephen.....?
Just coming!
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